Question: How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Answer: Exactly 9
One to argue that the lightbulb is illusory, and lies in an unreal world of fragile, imperfect sense-experience, the real lightbulb being inaccessible to us
One to argue that the lightbulb, being no more than a collection of sense-data, will cease to exist as soon as it is no longer perceived, and that hence the very action itself is pointless.
One to argue that changing a lightbulb is a trivial task, best left to the snivelling, inferior Judeo-Christian masses who exist only to serve great men.
One to argue that the new lightbulb cannot be indentical to the previous one, and that it must be a synthesis of previous lightbulbs before it can be changed.
One to argue that the meaning and reference of 'lightbulb' and 'change' must be satisfactorily settled before any action is taken.
One to argue that instead of changing lightbulbs for the capitalist bourgeoise, one should revolt and create a classless worker's paradise.
One to argue that people should just get on with changing the damn lightbulb, and stop talking already.
One to argue, based on this diversity of opinion amongst the philosophers, that we can know nothing about lightbulbs or the process of changing them.
One, the most brilliant of them all, to conclude that the changing of lightbulbs is best left to non-philosophers.
Jæja, getið þið gískað á hvaða heimspekingar þetta eru? Sá sem gískar þá alla rétt á inni bjór hjá mér.
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